Tag: The AI Grandad

I’m keeping this post nice and simple. I found a story I had written long before I discovered AI and wondered how ChatGPT’s new image generator would view it. So, I put the story ‘Bath Night’ into ChatGPT and asked for a picture that reflected the story. I liked what it gave me and thought I would share it.

The picture is above, and here is the story:

Bath Night

The tiny speck in the sky was hardly visible, even to the most powerful of telescopes, which was probably just as well. Had the authorities on Earth realised that it was an alien spacecraft they would have been concerned. That concern would have multiplied if they’d known just what its purpose was. 

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“It looks like we’ve found them Sir.”

“Thank goodness for that Captain. I wasn’t looking forward to having to report to the authorities that our mission had failed. What exactly have you got?”

“It’s a family unit, Sir. There appears to be a female and a male and two young siblings. Our probes indicate that they are the right age and all are relatively well preserved.”

“Excellent Captain. How long before we have them securely on board?”

“It’s happening as we speak, Sir. The transportation beam has already locked in on them and the process has begun.”

“Remember to take extra special care Captain. We don’t want a repeat of the accident we had last time.”

“Don’t worry, Sir everything has gone smoothly. The entire unit are now safely on board and being stored securely in the transportation chamber. They are currently being checked out to ensure suitability.”

“Well done Captain. Now before we leave, have we collected everything we need? I don’t want to have to come back for anything.

“We have beamed aboard everything we think we are going to need to recreate their environment when we return home, Sir, but I wasn’t sure about this? I’ve put a picture of it on the screen for you.”

“What exactly is that, Captain?”

“It’s what the earthlings call a bath or a bathtub, Sir. It would appear that all humans have one.”

“How strange. What exactly do they do with these unusual objects?”

“They use them for something they call bathing, Sir. Apparently, on a regular basis, they fill them with hot water and some sort of cleansing substances, then they take all their garments off and climb in to wash themselves and relax.”

“How disgusting!  It just goes to show what a primitive race these earthlings are. I sometimes wonder why we bother with them in the first place. Has your research thrown up any more of their strange bathtub habits Captain?”

“Well, Sir, our search of their databases has shown that they have a number of rituals linked to this object. Apparently there are occasions when more than one human will share the same bathtub. This often happens with the children and sometimes even the adults do it as well.”

“Unbelievable! Why would they do such a thing? Is it an earthling law that this machine has to be occupied by multiple humans?”

“No, Sir, it appears that it is purely a matter of choice. In fact it would seem to possibly be part of the mating habits of the adults but we have no idea why the children do it.”

“Maybe it is part of their training to be adults, Captain. I think it’s important we make a note of it in case we need to use it as part of the assimilation programme. Is there anything else?”

“Quite a bit, Sir. We have found that it is sometimes used as a means of killing off humans.”

“Intriguing Captain. These creatures never fail to amaze me. What exactly do they do?”

“Well, Sir, it would appear that sometimes they inflict this death upon themselves. They drink some crude, volatile liquids and take raw drugs and then purposely lower their head below the water until they stop breathing.”

“Incredible, Captain. It makes you wonder how such a primitive race as this has managed to evolve at all.”

“That’s not all, Sir. It would seem that sometimes this bathtub object is also used as a means of torture and execution. Our records show over the years many humans have been disposed of in this way,”

“The last thing we need Captain is our unit harming themselves in any way. They are an expensive commodity. If we do take it on board it is essential that they do not have access to it. Once we are home it will be up to the authorities how best to use it. Beam it aboard, Captain. I’m sure that it will make an excellent addition to the planned exhibition.Once you’ve done that, lets get away from this awful planet as quickly as possible. I shall be in my quarters, let me know when we are approaching home.”

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The resulting exhibition on Planet Volgan was a huge success. The inhabitants came in their droves to see the strange family of earthlings. The enclosure was a near perfect replica of their natural habitat. The most popular session was bath night. The crowds stood in awe, watching these primitive creatures going through these strange rituals. Security was always high on these occasions to ensure they didn’t harm themselves. To date the adults hadn’t yet shared a bath together but the authorities were hopeful that this would happen one day and that it might lead to the first earthlings being bred in captivity.

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