The 10-Second Curiosity Rule

If you’re puzzled by AI for more than ten seconds, ask it why, not how.

When I first started experimenting with AI, I treated it like a tricky gadget I couldn’t quite figure out. I’d type a prompt, get an odd or unhelpful reply, and then immediately start searching online for “how to fix it.” Half the time I’d end up buried in articles about neural networks, transformer models and training data, interesting, yes, but about as helpful as reading a car’s engineering manual when all you want to do is drive.

Over time, I realised something simple: AI doesn’t reward those who understand every detail of how it works, it rewards those who stay curious. Every mistake, every odd answer, every unexpected twist in a conversation is an opportunity to ask why rather than how.

That’s how the 10-Second Curiosity Rule began. It came from one of those slightly exasperating moments when ChatGPT gave me an answer that made no sense at all. My first instinct was to sigh and close the laptop. But I stopped myself, took a breath, counted to ten, and asked, “Why did you say that?”

What came back wasn’t just an explanation. It was insight. The AI told me it had interpreted my question differently to how I’d meant it. In that moment, I realised I wasn’t talking to a “machine”, I was in a dialogue with a system trying, in its own logical way, to make sense of me.

That single moment changed how I use AI entirely. Now, whenever I feel lost or confused, I follow my own simple rule:
If I don’t understand something after ten seconds, I ask why.

Why, Not How

When we ask how, we step into the machine’s world. It’ll start talking about algorithms, data patterns, training models, or probabilities, things that, unless you’re an engineer, sound like another language.

But when we ask why, we invite the machine into our world. That’s a conversation, not a lecture.

For example, if ChatGPT gives me an oddly cheerful answer to a serious question, I might ask, “Why did you choose that tone?” Often it replies that it was trying to sound encouraging or polite, suddenly I understand the reasoning, not just the result.

Another time, NotebookLM summarised one of my blog posts but missed what I thought was the key idea. Instead of thinking, “It doesn’t work!”, I asked, “Why did you leave that part out?”
Its response made me realise my original writing had buried the point halfway down the page. The AI hadn’t failed, it had highlighted a flaw in my own structure.

Ten Seconds That Change The Mood

Ten seconds doesn’t sound long, but it’s enough time to stop frustration in its tracks. That pause is like a mental deep breath. It turns “This thing’s broken” into “What’s really happening here?”

I sometimes think of it like helping a friend with a new gadget. You wouldn’t expect instant perfection, you’d experiment, explore, and maybe laugh a bit when things go wrong. AI deserves that same patience.

So next time ChatGPT gives you a weird answer, count to ten before you close the tab. Then type: “Why did you say that?” or “Why did you think this was the best answer?” The reply might surprise you, and sometimes, it even teaches the AI to respond better next time.

Curiosity Is The Bridge

Older adults, myself included, are often told we need to “keep up” with technology, as if it’s a race. But AI isn’t a race; it’s a relationship. Curiosity is the bridge that connects both sides.

That’s why I think AI rewards the curious. The people who experiment, who test, tweak, question, and wonder, get the most out of it. The AI learns from you, and you learn from it.

It reminds me of when I first started using voice assistants. I used to bark short commands, “Set timer! Play music!”, and they worked, sort of. Then one day I asked, “Why can’t you find that song?” and it explained I hadn’t linked my music account. That one question solved a problem that had annoyed me for weeks.

The same applies here: AI isn’t just a tool; it’s a partner that responds to the quality of your curiosity.

Try The 10-Second Curiosity Rule Today

Here are a few ways to practise it:

• Pause before frustration. When an answer doesn’t make sense, wait ten seconds before typing again.
• Ask why, then explore. Don’t stop at “Why?”, follow up with “Can you show me another way?” or “What if I asked differently?”
• Turn errors into insight. If AI misunderstands you, ask it to explain how it interpreted your request. You’ll learn how it thinks, and how to prompt better next time.
• Reflect afterwards. What did you discover about yourself in the exchange? That’s often where the real learning hides.

The Wisdom Behind The Rule

When I first created The AI Grandad, I wanted to prove something: that curiosity doesn’t fade with age. In truth, it’s curiosity that keeps us young. These small habits, ten seconds here, one question there, build confidence.

AI won’t always be right. But if we keep asking why, we stay engaged, alert, and adaptable, and that, I suspect, is the true secret to lifelong learning.

Takeaway

Next time AI confuses you, don’t rush to the settings or close the tab.
Pause for ten seconds, breathe, and ask why. That single question can turn confusion into connection, and that’s the heart of the 10-Second Curiosity Rule.

Video Overview

Every now and again I put one of my posts through NotebookLM to create a Video Overview. This gives you a chance to listen to the ideas explored in this post. Let me know what you think.

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