Number 135476 

“I used to be someone else.”

“Oh yeah, who was that then? Someone famous was it? Don’t tell me, let me guess. I bet you was Elvis. That’s it, you was Elvis Presley. You wait ’til I tell my missus I’ve been chatting with Elvis, that’ll make her giggle.”

“No, seriously, before I came here I had a name and a life.”

“Course you did mate. That’s what they all say in here. If I had a pound for every person who told me that, I could retire from this lousy job and live like a millionaire.”

“I don’t care about the others. I just know that I used to be someone. I just can’t remember the details.”

“Maybe you should leave it like that. Don’t want to go upsetting yourself trying to remember things best forgotten.”

“But I don’t want to forget. There must be somebody here who can help me. What about the records? This establishment must have records about us. They would tell me who I used to be.”

“I don’t know nothing about any records. My job is to just look after the people on this corridor. People like you. Why don’t I go and make us both a nice cup of tea?”

“I don’t want tea! I want to know who I am. Couldn’t you find out for me?”

“Me! You must be joking. More than my jobs worth that would be. There’s some very serious people running this place. There’s no way I’m going to do anything that might upset them.”

“In that case I’ll go and find out for myself. If you could just unlock the door and tell me where to go.”

“Now come on Number 134576 you know I can’t unlock this door. It’s against regulations. If I did that we’d both be in serious trouble. What about that tea? I might even be able to find a chocolate digestive.”

“Sod the bloody tea! I need to find out who I am. If you won’t help me I’ll do it myself. As soon as you’ve gone I’m going to break down this door and find out who I really am.”

“I think you’re forgetting about Number 135489 aren’t you? He tried that only last week. Remember? He didn’t get far, did he? The cameras monitored him from the moment he stepped into the corridor. The security people caught him just three minutes later. It was all so messy, I’ve never seen so much blood. It’s a good thing these corridors are completely tiled otherwise it would have taken me weeks to clean it all up.”

“But I need to know who I am.”

“Of course you do Number 134576. Now if you just roll up your sleeve I’ll give you some extra medication. Get rid of all those silly thoughts you’re having. Then I’ll go and get us both that cup of tea. Two sugars was it?